(picture taken from Pinterest)

Putting a horse down or losing one to natural causes is hard and painful. There will be tears, anger, denial, hurt, and many emotions and feelings and life may seem pretty gray for a while. That is normal. Horses are a huge part of any horse-owners life on the physical, mental, and emotional level. It only makes sense that it would cause an upheaval in your life.

We all understand how hard it is for people when a human friend or family member dies, but our society tends to not give as much weight or understanding to the death of an animal friend. Sometimes people who have lost a horse or another pet feeling like they have no outside support. People may tell them to, "Just get over it," or "You can get another one. After all, it was just an animal." Those comments or a lack of understanding hurt. Deeply. Surround yourself with people you understand and can support you through your grief. Your feelings and the situation is very real. Give yourself permission to treat it as such.

The presence of an animal in your life, especially one as big as a horse, is huge and impacts your life on many, many levels. You take care of them. They depend on you. You work with them and have fun with them. You plan your day around them. They're your partner, your friend. You love them. And they love you. Take that away and you have a major hole in your life. How do you deal with the pain, sadness, and confusion?

Allow the feelings to come. You do not have to act on them, but it is important to feel the emotions so you can let them go. Don't stuff. Feelings that are stuffed will cause more problems.

Find outside support, whether it is a spouse, family member, friend or even a pet grief support group. Find someone who will listen and understand and be there for you.

There are many articles and websites online about the grieving process for pets. They talk about the stages of grief which are listed below.

1. Denial, shock, and numbness.

2. Anger

3. Bargaining

4. Depression

5. Acceptance

You may not feel these emotions in the order in which they are listed. You may not experience a particular emotion at all. But this is a guideline to help you realize what you're feeling and that what you are feeling is legitimate.

The hurt and pain is real. But so is acceptance. Be gentle with yourself, give yourself grace. Allow yourself time to mourn and time to heal. Acceptance does come. You will be okay again. And when you reach the other side of the process you'll find it full of beautiful memories of times spent with your horse that now you can look back on with a smile.

"There are friends and faces that may be forgotten, but there are horses that never will be." --Andy Adams

~ Saddle Up